How to Teach your Children the Joy of Giving
Generosity is a characteristic that most of us hope to see our children embrace. How can we teach them about the power of giving back to those who need support the most?
Christmas is a great time of year to highlight the joy of giving back to others in need and instilling in them the idea that there’s more to life than receiving gifts. Jennifer McIntosh, a clinical child psychologist and Deakin University Professor, states that when fostering the traits of empathy and generosity in your child, it’s vital they are shown the foundations of empathy at a very early age.
According to McIntosh, “The roots of empathy are one of the top developmental achievements in the first years of life. It’s the quality of parenting that a baby experiences. The way parents respond to their baby in a sensitive way.”
McIntosh continues to mention how the attachment relationship between children and parents influences brain development and the building of higher-order functioning, particularly the set-up of the prefrontal cortex, the area that grows and supports emotions like empathy.
In her opinion, showcasing empathy and generosity to others is one of the most important jobs a parent can give to their child, so they feel wanted. It’s not only important to teach compassion as a principle in life, but the child will also begin life understanding what it’s like to accurately feel what themselves and others are feeling. In other words, your response to your baby sets up for them to experience empathy.
At the age of two, children who have received empathy in the first two years of life are able to show the trait themselves. Preschool education is essential for nurturing the capacity for empathy and generosity so that children can cooperate in groups collaboratively and understand how these behaviors affect other people.
Leading by Example
Christmas or any holiday that features gift-giving is ideal for parents to exemplify empathetic traits. McIntosh argues that it’s critical for parents to not only talk about the importance of being generous but also to show their children that they are being generous. One way parents can show this is by volunteering around Christmas time or purchasing gifts that are from charities and regifting them. Parents can make all these proactive choices. They can put themselves on volunteering lists or highlight the impact of giving back. Show how it’s great to help others and how it can make the giver feel great.
It’s also important to discuss with children how you will give back to others. Similar to the excitement around children receiving presents for birthdays or Christmas, it’s important to show that same excitement when talking about giving back. Some suggest that it’s important to make sure the list of what you’re going to give is long or equal to the list of what your family wants for the holidays. These principles are essential to weave into everyday life and helps establish empathy in children.
McIntosh believes one of the most essential steps to building empathy in children is seeing their parents make the effort to give back to others. Kids who see their parents go out of their way to help other people are more likely to mimic that behavior. Much of the impact is non-verbal and is even associated with the rewards center in our brains. Even before a child has words, it’s important we showcase our civil responsibilities when it comes to caring for people less fortunate than us.
Starting Lessons in Empathy Early
Parents should consider what type of theology they might teach their kids at home or the humanitarian values they want to instill in their kids.
A child can learn to pick flowers, give them to somebody and watch the beautiful expression on their face. There are so many small, yet simple ways to show your child how to give back.
It’s important that modeling this behavior will help them learn it, but it should come naturally and not feel artificial. When children have a strong sense of empathy, it encourages tolerance and helps them build strong personal relationships and a better level of happiness. It can even promote better mental health.
As with anything, there are limits to how much generosity we can give others, but it’s important that parents highlight these lessons throughout childhood. After all, showing generosity is not only responsible; it’s a natural and logical choice that helps society thrive.